All right, y’all. I’m blogging about this because I NEVER remember my dreams. For all I know I’m a freak of nature who doesn’t dream…though I know we all do, I just hardly ever remember them except for maybe twice a year when they’re super traumatic and I’m being chased by an axe wielding Teddy Ruxpin or something weird like that.

Anyway, I woke up with such a vivid picture in my head of what I dreamed last night and it was so positively cool that I figured it was time to pull my blog-about-a-dream card.

Imagine if you will: I am wandering around a store with lots of cool knick-knacky things, wondering where I am…when I realize I’m actually in a book store in the one area where they don’t have books, which admit it…is sometimes the most fun part. As I venture past the corner I notice a long line of people and then, oh…Hillary Rodham Clinton. My powers of deduction tell me she’s doing a signing, and my need to meet famous people tells me I need to buy a book.

Sadly this bookstore is apparently way under-prepared for someone like Hillary because they’re out of books. I take this as a sign to just wander up to the front of the line (apparently I have no societal rule-following tendencies in my dream), step around the podium and say hello.

As would obviously happen in real life, Hillary is happy to immediately stop signing books for the masses and step aside to talk to me. She also starts shaking my hand and never lets go. The whole time we’re talking (which was probably in dream land…10 minutes), she does not let go of my hand. The awkward thing is that we were walking around, but we were not holding hands…we were in “hand shaking” mode the whole time, which now that I think of it, probably looked like some weird Mennonite folk dance but THIS IS A DREAM, PEOPLE.

So we’re standing there, Hillary is talking to me and shaking my hand, and we look up and there is a poster for MGM Studios in Hollywood. At this point I realize we had been talking about me making movies (because when I meet one of the most powerful people in the world, I’m going to talk about ME), and Hillary says still forcefully shaking my hand, “You MUST go to Hollywood and work at MGM.”

I don’t even know if MGM still exists or what I’d do there, but at this point in my dream I realize my hand is sweaty from all that shaking and I’m more aghast that I may have made the Secretary of State’s own hand sweaty by association, so I try to gently withdraw. She is not having it and keeps a tight grip.

I figure now is a good time to…ask about foreign policy? No. Tell her about my EP of course (it’s called For & Against and you can buy it right here). I don’t have any because I am a horrible promoter (unless I’m talking to Hillary, apparently) and I promise to mail her one.

Then my alarm went off. I assume she went back to signing books for the plebeians in line after letting go of my hand.  I awoke refreshed and ready to go to Hollywood.

“WHAT LESSONS CAN YOU GET FROM THIS, JANA?” you ask? Good question because there has to be a point.

• Defy the norms to get ahead.

Imagine what a lame dream it would have been if I either decided no books left equals no autograph, or to just wait in line like everyone else. I probably would have woken up out of boredom from standing in line.  Take a risk.

• Tell people what you do and don’t be shy about it.

For real, I KNOW what Hillary does. She didn’t know what I was all about so I told her. I am much more assertive in dreamland than the real world, but I need to try this out more and tell people what projects I have in the works. Since Hillary learned I was into making films and a musician, I’m pretty sure my next dream will entail me being her personal documentarian and playing the Christmas show at the Clinton Presidential Library or something.

• Ask mentors and more experienced people for advice.

Asking smart, powerful people for advice is two-fold in benefits because most likely they will give you good advice, but it’s also a roundabout way of networking. You ask Hillary for advice about working for MGM one day, next thing you know she’s hooking you up with her friend at the State Department who needs to go camera shopping and BOOM!, you’re a consultant (note: I do not know what they do at the State Department when they need new gear but I assume they don’t need me to help them shop for it).

• Have a firm handshake.

She had a really firm handshake. Maybe not for 10 minutes, but don’t be weak about it.

So thanks, Hillary. I got your book a while ago and it’s been on my list but now it has moved to the top of the stack. I look forward to it.  If you ever need a folk singer or a documentarian, call me!